What can hospitals offer families of patients who are dying?

When someone is dying in hospital, their family often remember the small things.

Whether there was somewhere quiet to sit, whether anyone explained what was happening, whether they could get a cup of tea without leaving the ward for too long.

These things may sound simple, but when you are sitting at the bedside of someone you love, they matter.

We were recently contacted by a hospital who asked if we could share some of the different ways other hospitals support families of patients who are dying.

It felt worth sharing more widely, because this is a question many hospitals are already thinking about.

In most cases, families don’t need anything complicated. They need clear information, practical help, and the feeling that they have not been forgotten while all the attention is, understandably, on the person who is dying.

One of the most valuable things a hospital can offer is time

That’s why many of our healthcare partners choose to set up teams of carefully selected and trained end of life volunteers. 

These volunteers sit alongside people who are dying, offering calm companionship and support to families and friends during an incredibly difficult time. They don’t replace clinical care, they add something different alongside it.

They have time to sit, time to listen and time to notice when someone looks lost or unsure. They can help family members find the right people to speak to, or gently signpost them to other support available in the hospital.

For many families, that can make the whole experience feel less frightening.

Hospitals can also make a real difference by creating a quiet, comfortable space for families to use away from the bedside

Family rooms or family hubs give people somewhere to breathe. Somewhere to make a phone call, cry, gather themselves, eat something, or sit quietly for a few minutes without feeling as though they are in the way.

When these spaces are supported by end of life volunteers, they can become more than just a room. They become somewhere families can be looked after too.

Free parking is another simple but important offer

Hospital parking can be expensive, and when someone is dying, families may be coming in every day, sometimes for long stretches of time. The cost can quickly become another worry at the worst possible moment.

Removing that pressure won’t change what is happening, but it can change how supported a family feels while it is happening.

Meal vouchers can help in the same way

When someone has been sitting by a bedside for hours, or even days, they may not have eaten properly. They may not want to leave, and they may not be thinking clearly enough to look after themselves.

A hot meal, a sandwich, or free tea and coffee on the ward can be a small act of care. It says: we know you are here too, and we know this is hard.

Some hospitals also provide simple care packs for patients and visitors

 These do not need to be elaborate. Often, the most useful items are the most ordinary ones.

A care pack might include:

• Toothbrush and toothpaste

• A hairbrush or comb

• Tissues

• Deodorant

• Wet wipes

• Hand sanitiser

• Hand cream

• A notebook and pen

• A razor and shaving foam

• Lip balm

• A small sweet treat

These items can be especially helpful for families who arrived in a hurry, or who end up staying far longer than they expected.

It can also be useful to include clear, practical information in these packs.

Families may need to know who coordinates the end of life volunteer service, how to ask for support, where the quiet room is, where they can get food, whether there is a chapel or multi-faith space, where the cashpoint is, or who they can speak to if they are worried.

In hospital, even simple information can be hard to find when you are tired, frightened or upset.

None of these ideas are complicated. But together, they can make a hospital feel less overwhelming at one of the most difficult times in a person’s life.

At the Anne Robson Trust, we believe no one deserves to die alone, and that families should feel supported when someone they love is dying.

None of these is grand gestures; they’re simple, human ones. And at the end of life, that is often what matters most.